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The online diary of an ethical pervert.

Thursday, 7 August 2008

Jobs for the boys

Perhaps I have been lucky, and that luck has lead me to become a little greedy. The Photographer is a bisexual switch. This gives us both a lot of flexibility in play, and also in idle (and not so idle) fantasies. It has made me extremely curious as to what could be done with another bi switch male, and so locating such a person has become a small obsession of mine. Or perhaps rather ours, as I think it's safe to say that we are both quite keen on this.

There appears to be a certain hesitancy amongst men to play with other men, excluding the gay contingent obviously, yet performing girl-on-girl is considered as much a part of the female submissive's arsenal as collar wearing and kneeling. I've had a few reasons bandied about as to why this should be so, starting with the knee-jerk "but I'm straight". I find it interesting that BDSM could produce heteronormativity to such an extent. After all, it's just a body: it can give and receive pleasure. How is oral sex from a man different to a woman, surely it might be better given that they have more direct appreciation for how that feels?

Other ideas in the mix include the fact that women are "naturally" more disposed to touch each other. Which sounds like cultural conditioning at best and a big bag of tosh at worst. We are going to run into a lot of trouble if we start to cling to what is "natural" and what is not, starting with PVC and moving onwards. The societal influence is one that is perhaps worth thinking about however; that men appear to be made to feel uncomfortable and even embarrassed by considering other men as sexual beings or viewing them in a sexual way, unless they are actually gay. Which is a little sad, when you think about it, though all of that tension must go somewhere and probably accounts for interest in aggressive sports. It would perhaps be nice to channel that energy into a more productive (productive for me, anyhow) context.

I can understand the angle "I tried it a few times and didn't like it", but to not try at all seems a little feeble. Generally speaking, I'm in favour of anything that adds variety to my life, and it's not as if I'm proposing anything that I'd be unwilling to do myself. We're in a fortunate position of all being adults who understand that fucking someone, or even simply playing with them, does not indicate a lifelong committment or a need to go out and pick curtains together. Mix it up a little, gentlemen, you might like it.

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