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The online diary of an ethical pervert.

Tuesday, 15 May 2012

Playing with people

As part of the process of training Ganymede, and because (frankly) I'd missed playing with her, I invited Blush over for a BDSM threesome this weekend. Group sex is always a bit of a gamble, group kink is even more so. Not only do you need to have participants who are sexually interested in each other but they also have to by psychologically attuned. I place my bets every time I introduce Ganymede to someone else, it's not just about what affect a new body, a new person might have on him, it's about what effect my playing with that person might have and the fact that whenever you include any additional partners you always change the dynamic.

I had reasonable hopes of good odds on this one. Blush and I have a natural connection, the sadist in me matches perfectly with the masochist in her, and she is a good submissive fit for my dominance. I knew that I was using the often flawed argument of "well, I like both of them, so they must both like each other." Fortunately I was right.

The order of the evening was a long, drawn out session of co-subbing (for them) and co-ordinating wonderful, dreadful things (for me). We relaxed into it, I had all the space and time in the world and no intention of rushing. We met for dinner and drinks and then had coffee and liqueur whilst the heating went on and food was digested at the Citadel of Kink. I was whispering silent noises of happiness at the luxury of being able to do this, without worry of interruption and the level of security and control this had offered me.  It felt like civilisation.

We discussed, briefly, over dinner what people may or may not be interested in doing. Both of them trust me and neither of them wanted to ruin the surprise so I let the conversation linger briefly on what they might expect. All the better to warm up their anticipation.

Once everything else was warmed up, I moved on to play. We opened up one of the boxes of tricks, and I showed Blush all of the new kit I had acquired since we last played together. I had the remarkable fortune of being gifted a very large bag of some very high quality bondage kit, including a couple of pieces that I have only seen rarely. Her eyes widened and she made a pleasing "oooh" sound. Together with Ganymede, I stripped her down, displaying her body for him, removing stockings and suspenders and applying thick, black buckled leather wrist and ankle cuffs, designed for suspension. This set has three large straps and the wrist pieces almost resemble gauntlets or boxing gloves. She ginned widely as they went on. I set the boy to work licking her cunt whilst I blindfolded her and applied a set of clover clamps to her breasts, then used a pinwheel at the top of her cunt, just above where he was licking.

Once he was in place, I stripped him down and spanked his exposed bottom encouragingly. The game of co-subbing is about balance and contact. Keeping both submissives entertained at the right levels so that neither feels "left out" in a way that would be inappropriate - as opposed to, say, a game of abandonment, or cuckolding, or voyeurism. For a dominant, this means twice the work, in theory, but if it works well it is absolutely twice the fun. And of course, I was able to use them both as toys for the other. Hierarchy, spoken or unspoken, is one of the best ways to help frame what you might do. I knew that Blush would recoil at doing anything which was toppy or dominant, but that Ganymede might appreciate being used as a tool of violence. So that was how I arranged the situation. He was my spare pair of hands, a way of acting upon her flesh. She was my way of giving him pleasure, without having to do so myself, and I made her suck his cock whilst I smiled at him from across the room.

There is an absolute joy in making other bodies sing to your tune, to move them this way and the other, leading them on a merry dance through all kinds of pleasures and pain. I clipped them together at the neck, watching them kiss with the satisfaction of the world's greatest pornographer. Personalised sex acts, just for me. I changed their positions, putting his cock inside her and locking her wrists around his back. He fucked. I gagged him and watched his face as she, teasingly, kissed the hardened leather covering his mouth. Finally, I slid a plug inside him and, pressing in with me knee, ground him into her. 

"This is how missionary sex works, right?"

Later, we put a leather arm sleeve on Blush, which arched her back and pressed her breasts out for more torture. I slipped the latex hood onto Ganymede and put him on his back, then made her straddle his face whilst I fucked him. I remember thinking that perhaps this was an ideal girls' night in, with both of us using him for our pleasure and me kissing her whilst I ran my nails down her back, reminding her of their sharpness and cruelty. When he came, he came hard, the orgasm shuddering through his body. Together, Blush and I, smiling, gently removed the hood and held him until he came back to the room, to the world and to himself with a grin so wide it threatened to split his face in half.

Perhaps one of the more intimate moments came later, when, natural as if it had been something we always did, we showered, turned down the bed and all went to sleep together. In the morning, Ganymede tidied, I made breakfast and coffee whilst Blush went out for croissants. We sat together on rugs and cushions and discussed the night before, agreeing to future dates, and future possibilities.

Thursday, 10 May 2012

Citadel of Kink

Perverts, as I've said before, are in many ways a subset of geeks. We like strange things, with peculiar names, we spend a lot of money on mysterious sounding and looking "kit", we like the colour black, bandy together in groups to teach each other outre activities and go to odd clubs in odd outfits whilst people give us odd looks on public transport.

Codes and safe spaces are important to geeks and perverts alike. Ways of naming things that make sense to people that are "in the know" and indicate that these things, these places are safe for "people like us". The codes, and the places, are chosen in particular ways, depending on their use.

Recently, I've been looking for a new place to live and have finally found one. I'm in the very happy situation of (finally) being able to have a place just to myself, which means I can select location and all kinds of other details based on exactly what I want - within reason, and budget. Naturally, what I really want is a warehouse conversion apartment with a huge glass wall overlooking the Thames, brick walls and a series of iron girders to tie people to. For the moment and until I have made my fortune in this gold-paved city, I get the one thing every pervert really, really needs.


Domination relies on you being able to exert and manage control. Control of environment is key to giving a safe (regardless of whether it seems safe or not) space for all kinds of play. Simple things like managing temperature, music, where the furniture is, how the kit is laid out, lighting levels. These all create the space for play and having your own place makes all of that much, much easier. In my experience, the harder, heavier and, let's be honest, noisier, the play is going to be, the more privacy and the more control you need to maintain over what's around you. It also means that you can be a bit more adhoc, if suddenly you feel the need to drag a naked submissive, kicking and screaming to the bathroom to drench them in icy water, you can. 

Knowing you are alone in a space can instantly make you feel relaxed, and it's much easier to deliver a good scene if you feel relaxed. When you have a place to yourself it can become "yours", and the sense of ownership and singular ownership at that is something that benefits the dominant persuasion - we like having things to ourselves, like cats with cream. The worry about being interrupted - whether it's someone just knocking on the door to see if you are OK, or being able to overhear conversations in another room - can be seriously scene-breaking to your concentration, especially if you are trying to maintain some kind of mood. It's one thing to manufacture the belief in your submissive or bottom that they might be interrupted, or suddenly exposed, but you need to have control over that exposure. Further, I think it is unfair and to a certain extent a little unethical to make other people participate in kinky activities if they haven't chosen to. Doing things like having a partner on a lead, or kneeling at your feet when you are watching the television can make life with flatmates uncomfortable. No matter how accommodating, lovely or understanding those flatmates are, ultimately they are not in a D/s relationship with your partner.

And that's even assuming that you have the luxury, as I have had for many years, of lovely, understanding flatmates.

There are other things that perverts need, and whilst looking for a place I have made a reasonable list of them. Windows and outdoor areas that aren't overlooked, as few and far neighbours as possible (having people call the police is never good, and the human ear is very well attuned to the noise of other people in pain), strong floors and sturdy ceilings, easily cleaned flooring, good water pressure, interesting cupboards that can be locked from the outside, lots of storage space for all that kit, landlords that are very "hands off", access to the centre of town for clubbing and ease of returning in a taxi. Security is also important, partly because it's always nice to feel safe, but also because it gives a good look and feel to the place. Nothing says "pervert" quite like locks, bars and chains.   

I've lucked out and managed to find a place on the top floor of a building that has no other flats in it, and is on the end of a block. I have my own metal gate, then a door which leads up my own private stairwell and to another door. The windows overlook rooftops. Over here in Kinksville, there is something of a naming convention with our places of residence, that they all have their own little code names to indicate their particular flavour and style of perversion, such as The House Of Rope (THOR). No prizes for guessing who lives there.

So, it is with a happy, and heady grin, looking forward to luring people over for days and nights of terrible things, that I can announce I've got a Citadel Of Kink. Or COK, for short. No sniggering at the back...

...oh, go on then.