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The online diary of an ethical pervert.

Monday, 29 June 2009

Hunting games

The Photographer forwarded me an invite to participate in a "subby hunt". I've always been attracted to the idea of this, in a similar way to the idea of a slave auction - the public nature of it, the vying for attention, the concrete nature of being caught or bought. Who doesn't like the thought of being chosen, of being selected as the perfect person to have terrible things done to them. Then there is the thrill of being chased, heart rate rising, senses on edge and the potential to be hog tied and carried back, triumphantly.

However, the more I thought about it, the more I realised I would be terrible at it. For a start, the game is set up to the advantage of the Doms (unsurprisingly), they get a head start to hide out in the field and prepare traps and schema for hunting the subs. Which means that it is likely to be over fairly quickly, which seems unfortunate. Secondly, it is a game, and I have a tendency to need to win at games. I have a competitive streak that is perfectly well-behaved in normal situations: I hand my pride, together with my will over to the person in charge, trusting them to give them back afterwards, allowing me to relax into another's arms, and desires. But in a field, fully clothed, with a lot of strangers, with a scorecard of items to collect? That's more difficult. If I'm going to play, I want to win, but this is a game designed to make the submissive "lose" (in terms of the game, obviously being caught and taken away is the point). Finally, and this is the most tricky, there is the issue of consent and safety. Beforehand, all submissives must complete a form, detailing what they are prepared to do, and with who. You can even specifically state one person who you want to capture you, for safety's sake, there are a lot of limits on the amount of struggling and fighting that can be done (very little). Sadly, I just couldn't imagine myself being able to enjoy this game, no matter how attractive the idea is. It feels like a contrivance (which of course it is) in a schoolground chase me, chase me! sort of way. Because, like kiss-chase, the personal objective is to be caught which makes it feel forced and fake: I don't think I'd be able to run. To my mind, there wouldn't be any point to it since I could just stay with the person I wanted to catch me anyway and we could have a picnic, or something.

This made me think more about my attitude to scenes, roleplays, sexualised fantasies that orbit around the concept of "game". I suppose I need the game to feel realistic before I can participate, for the risk and reward to be genuine. For example, the poker night works for me because of the element of chance involved in the cards, and also that I am not the one playing, I take the forfeit for the Domme I am partnered with.

I tried to work out a way in which the hunt could be refined, to work for me. Certainly if the submissives were given a head start, and then they were actually hunted (like foxes and other animals) that would work better for me, rather than dumbly running into a gauntlet. I like the idea of incorporating a sense of fear and tension, so not knowing the number of hunters, or who they were, what they might do to you when they got you. I also would want to be able to fight back, to struggle properly, to hurt and be hurt in the way that a wild thing might do. Obviously, this game requires more trust and knowledge about other play partners, but I think it could be much more exciting, for me at any rate. Further experimentation needed.

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