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The online diary of an ethical pervert.

Tuesday 11 August 2009

Turning over a new leaf

Over dinner, last night, I had a heart-to-heart with The Photographer. I'm constantly reassured by the frankness of our conversations - I've never felt especially embarrassed discussing sex with anyone, but our mutual experiments work all the better for knowing what the other person wants. In this case, I want to try my hand at domination, not just for a night or so, but ongoing. He's a little stressed out at the moment and has been hankering after the release of submission. Perfect, no? We tried a taster session in the evening and the feelings I got from being in control were totally absorbing, as satisfying, albeit in different ways, to being submissive to him - which surprised me.

I'd expected to feel a little off-guard, as if it wasn't my "natural" inclination, but I didn't get any of that at all. He was mine, to play with as I wanted, and he was keen to do so: kneeling down naked on the floor, planting kisses on my stomach until I paid him a bit of attention. As a symbol of servitude, I could get used to this. I played with his hair for a while - I like grabbing a man by the hair - the small, gasped "ah!" proving that this is really what he wanted.

"Fetch me three things you want me to use on you." I wanted to see what he would bring, what sort of mood he was in. Part of the process is for me to find out what sort of submission he is interested in, the type of relationship, and type of play, we might develop. He lays them out on the bed. A glass dildo, with a lovely purple swirling set of ridges and a neat little looped handle, a ball gag and a length of cord that resembles a shoelace. I think it is, in fact, a shoelace. Cock bondage and anal play then. I don't tell him this, of course, but sit on the edge of the bed as he kneels at my feet. It's a good place to be. I feel calm, confident, entertained and slightly predatory. Like a cat with a ball of string.

The ball gag goes on straight away. His eyes close, shutting himself away with his feelings. He becomes a body that makes noise - I read his responses through his skin. I thread the cord through his nipple piercings, patting and tapping them lightly, then pull it taut, using the ends to loop around his balls, tying it tight. I love CBT. The precision and concentration of focus fits well with how I like to play, as well as the pleasure derived from a cock that stiffens when you hit it. Little pats from my finger tips slowly building into heavier blows, this way and that. Blood rushes in and the erection pulls the cord taut. The pain is turning him on. Good. That turns me on.

I do that for a while, then lie him down on his back, legs slightly bent at the knee and parted wide. I rub some lube between my fingertips then start to tease his anus, testing the muscles. I press the dildo against him, hoping the glass is still cool enough to cause a little shiver - iced water for next time, perhaps? It takes a while, but steadily I press it into him, he flexes his legs and bends to receive it. That makes me smile: he's hungry for it. I slip the cord from around his cock and piercings, giving him a couple of moments of respite before looping it around the handy "O" at the end of the dildo allowing me to secure the ends around the base of his cock in an impromptu arab strap. All tied up. I'm horny now, very much so, all the moans and flushed flesh have worked their magic. Time for him to earn his keep. I put him on his knees again, smiling as I think how the string must be pulling at his cock, the pressure inside his arse.

I unfasten the ball gag and press his mouth against my cunt. He knows what to do, and he's very good at it. Another reason for pursuing this sort of relationship - I can make him do this whenever I want. That's a thought to keep a girl warm at night. I lie back and think of my beautiful, naked boy-slave, lapping eagerly at my clit. It's a perfect place to be, secure in the knowledge that he will shortly bring me to orgasm, which he does. I lie there for a while, letting his head rest against my leg, grinning. I'll let him masturbate in a while, if he can make himself come whilst tied up like that, I'm looking forward to feeding him his own come, and to make him used to that over time. He does manage it, after a few minutes, faster than I'd thought. I enjoy the floor show, having first replaced the gag. No orgasm with an open orifice, I think, mentally making up rules for him to live up to.

Later on, falling asleep with him curled around me, he's calmer, relaxed and with a softness to his voice and mannerism. Subservient. He fetched me a glass of water, cleaned the dildo and put everything away. It's not just about the play, it's also about the aftercare. For me and for him. I'm marking the whole thing up as a success, he fell asleep fairly quickly so no feedback as yet, but I am certainly looking forward to see where we can take this. All the way, baby.

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