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The online diary of an ethical pervert.

Tuesday, 30 December 2008

Delicate parts

I think I may have sustained my first BDSM related injury. By injury, I mean something that wasn't really intended, so whilst I'll happily sport all the red lines and bruises with pride, this is more of an accident. Accidents are par for the course, of course, there's a risk to everything and it is never possible to eliminate all risk from activity. Potentially there is kink value in being curled up and kept very still, swaddled tightly in cotton wool, but even then there might be problems with breathing constriction.

I have a couple of tiny tears at the sides of my nipple piercings caused in all probability by over-enthusiastic pulling during play with Knight of Wands. He has been especially concerned, and yes, they are quite sore but they look to be healing fine. It's interesting to me because I had previously thought of them as being quite durable. They healed up very quickly with a minimum of fuss when they were done, and they have never had anything like the sensitivity that The Photographer's do, for example. On the other hand, I have only had them in for around six or so months and it's a delicate part of the body. I also think that the insertion of metal against flesh gives the impression of durability, when this is not the case. Metal is strong and unfeeling, flesh is very, very definitely not.

One of my difficulties, and something I am now keenly aware of and will bear in mind for the future is that my tolerance for pain is higher than my body's tolerance for damage. I mark very easily, and that's fine: marks that fade after a few weeks don't concern me over much, but the fact that I clearly can't tell especially well if something is causing "good" pain or "bad" pain, is a bit of a concern. To my mind, this must have a lot to do with the levels of adrenaline and endorphins being released as well as the sensation of being in sub-space, the connected disconnectedness of submission does not lend itself to rational and impartial observation of the body. Needless to say
the play itself didn't feel to be particularly heavy at the time I enjoyed it (we both did) but now, several days afterwards, they are still tender. Healing, but tender. So for the next couple of weeks I'm resigning myself to more philosophical and theoretical activities.

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